September 30, 2005
I'm Off
I'll be away for the weekend.
Back Monday.
Disturbing
hoookaaaay....
I'll never look at him in the same way again...
September 29, 2005
Test must be broken
| You are a Social Liberal (65% permissive) and an... Economic Conservative (70% permissive) You are best described as a:
Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid Free Online Dating Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test |
The worrying this is that the personality it placed me on was ADAM SANDLER.
September 28, 2005
Thud!
Just picked up the latest Discworld novel.
Which was simultaneously released with this:
There's a game too, apparently.
Kittens take on Rednecks
It's nearly time for the NRL final, where the Wests Tigers and the North Queensland Cowboys are going to go at it like two sets of suspected homosexuals checking each other for testicular cancer.
Personally, I'm going for the Cowboys, if only because of this picture:
The Dark Lord is giving me a sign, obviously.
September 20, 2005
Tear-jerking
What movies make us weepy?
People get teary-eyed at movies for other reasons as well.
The reaction of men and women to different movies is a celluloid re-make of Women are Venus and Men are Astronauts (or whatever).
An internet survey, endorsed with the official, deeply researched and established scientific techniques that made Mark Latham's diaries so credible (Ho Ho Ho!), shows women and men weep at vastly different movies.
The top tearjerker for men is Schindler's List. Women rate it 13th. The top women's weepie is Ghost, the Patrick Swayze/Demi Moore senseless salute to the supernatural, which is saved by having Unchained Melody as its theme.
I prefer the take of "Tom" in the "Your Say" section:
From: Tom
Comment: Only three movies have made me cry: 1) Gigli - if you werent in pain watching that you must have been asleep 2) Shazam - Shaq can not act, but he insists on trying and that makes me sad. 3) The Postman - Kevin Costner at his best in a post apocolyptic world where the postman (Costner) is the greatest source of inspiration. I cried that the apocolypse spared Costner. Big Brother makes me weepy too.
Right on.
September 19, 2005
Arrrr
Avast there ye scurvy dogs! It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day, so ye best be puttin on your best pirate drawl matey!
It's in the Pirate Code, matey!
Well, it be more of a guideline, actually.
Arrr....
September 15, 2005
Translation
Th' best, most fantastic translato' in th' entire wo'ld, cuss it all t' tarnation. Yessuh! Fry mah hide!
Pineapple?
Apparently Britney has had her spawn.
Names are being suggested...
How about Soda?
Weirdness
It's all go with Australia's favourite insane ex-Opposition Leader!
What's with this quote from Kevin Rudd (aka the Shadow Minister for Pacific Islands)?
In between a generally sensible response to ABC Radio AM on Mad Mark's latest raving, we get:
KEVIN RUDD: Alex, I was very close to my Mum. She brought me up from the age of 11, she died the day before the election, she was buried a few days before.
Either the incompetent ABC stuffed up a radio transcript, or Rudd just admitted to burying his mother alive....
Meanwhile, Latham's mentor goes on to grander pursuits: "Whitlam named Bird of Paradise"
September 14, 2005
September 13, 2005
Death awaits you with big pointy teeth
Let me just say, OUUUUUCCHH!!! to this idea....
Can we get one made of kryptonite, perhaps? You know, for this.
Thai delicacy
What a world we live in, where someone with the name Angela McKay can become Miss Thailand...
AN Australian girl who believed she didn't have the looks to make it as a Sydney model has been crowned Miss Thailand.
Angela McKay, 20, grew up with her Thai mother and Australian father in Margaret River, WA.
She won a modelling competition at 16 – as Girlfriend magazine's "face of 2000" – but when she moved to Sydney found the market "a bit difficult", her aunt Jill McKay said, so she headed overseas two years ago – landing work with a modelling agency in Bangkok.
Apparently she was told by someone in Sydney she didn't have the looks to become a model.
They must have smoked some bad granola.
I guess it just goes to prove this, eh....
Bugger
I bet Glenn "5-nil, mate, 5-nil!" McGrath is feeling like a bit of a dick.
Well, he should be, mark my words.
September 12, 2005
I will show you how a beautiful woman can suffer....
Sheesh, out of all the SuperDickery on this site, this one surely takes the cake.
Why comic authors were using this title to act out rape fantasies, I will never know.
Then again, it is DC.
Talkin' bout that devilish smile
The Hoff - not just the coolest dude in the universe, but, also the Antichrist.
Yeah.
What's in the ole brain
So, what have I been occupying my vast* mind with lately?
Well, it'd have to be either women or computer games, wouldn't it? They are mutually exclusive, aren't they?
Ahem
* Note: The mind in question may not actually be vast.
So, computer games.
Firstly, I've been having a bit of a bash at Dungeon Siege II, one of those curiously named "computer role-playing game". . Of course, bugger all role-playing involved, so I prefer to call 'em "click-fests".
'Cos that's basically what it is - hours and hours and destroying your mouse.
Still, great fun.
Above: Two heavily armoured gimps share an intimate moment in between killing large crabs. Meanwhile, Freud pauses thoughtfully...
And, lo and behold, there is a planned movie based on the game.
The hell? It surely can't be a faithful adaption unless it's just about some dickhead wandering around killing random things.
On the other hand....
BURT REYNOLDS!!!!
Anyway....
The other game I've been wasting time with is the demo of Age of Empires III.
Above: Pretty Red Uniforms are great at hiding blood.
There's something about blowing musketeers away with 19th Century cannons that screams "Family Fun!"
So that's a definate purchase some time in the future. Maybe even the "Ultra-Super-Premium-Ultimate-Nerdgasm-No Sex for You Ever" Edition.
Well, there's some other things on my mind too, but they don't relate to computer games, so that's a story for another time.
September 11, 2005
The Naked Truth
Oh, everyone's got themselves in a tiz because some Scottish dude has been waltzing around Edinburgh in the raw.
A man attempting to walk the length of Britain in the nude was jailed overnight for two weeks for his antics by an Edinburgh court.
So-called "naked rambler" Stephen Gough, 46, was arrested south of the Scottish capital on September 1 during his second attempt to walk the length of Britain with nothing to cover his modesty.
Gough, from Bournemouth on the southern English coast, was naked in court as sheriff Kenneth MacIver found him guilty of a breach of the peace.
He told Gough: "I have no doubt in my mind that walking naked through a Scottish town and along a busy road is not something which the Scottish public should be expected to deal with."
He said he thought individuals were likely to be "upset, alarmed or offended" by his antics.
Fair enough we all say. But what is to be made from comments like this:
In court, postman William Lister, 21, said he felt "pretty alarmed" and "pretty shocked" when he saw Gough and his girlfriend in the village of Roslin.
He saw the naked duo a short distance away from an elderly woman and her grandchild.
"I was concerned for the child, a child seeing nudity," Lister said.
"It's not something you see everyday - it's shocking."
What? Don't these people shower or something?
(Ok, yes, I know they're British and everything...)
However, I'm pretty sure most people get to see themselves in their naked glory at least once every day.
Or we should goddamn hope so....
Nippon Babylon
You've got to love the Japanese.
Sure, they're freaks and all...but entertaining freaks!
September 10, 2005
Let's Get Biblical
More Back of the Bible - this time it's the Book of Obadiah.
September 08, 2005
Stuff
- Not often you see this headline: Mum thrilled to find son in jail
- But I think we all agree with this: Party princess Paris Hilton has stunned fans around the world with the shocking confession that she's not sexy.. For sure. The time I spent watching that video is ten minutes of my life I'll never get back.
- Saucer of Milk for these ladies. Meow!
September 07, 2005
Now this is a diet.
Women of the world - here's a diet I think you'll enjoy better than anything you are currently trying:
A DIET recommending you eat 100g of chocolate a day and drink red wine, which will add six years to your life - is this for real?
Important Study for Uni Students
Believe the latest survey: 94 per cent of students like to get out on the grog.
What?
I don't believe it.
Beyond Parody
For anyone who though the portrayal of Sean Penn in Team America was a little exaggerated...
Behold! Satire is dead!
Sean Penn's rescue bid sinks
EFFORTS by Hollywood actor Sean Penn to aid New Orleans victims stranded by Hurricane Katrina foundered badly overnight, when the boat he was piloting to launch a rescue attempt sprang a leak.
Mr Penn had planned to rescue children waylaid by Katrina's flood waters, but apparently forgot to plug a hole in the bottom of the vessel, which began taking water within seconds of its launch.
The actor, known for his political activism, was seen wearing what appeared to be a white flak jacket and frantically bailing water out of the sinking vessel with a red plastic cup.
When the boat's motor failed to start, those aboard were forced to use paddles to propel themselves down the flooded New Orleans street.
Asked what he had hoped to achieve in the waterlogged city, the actor replied: "Whatever I can do to help."
With the boat loaded with members of Penn's entourage, including a personal photographer, one bystander taunted the actor: "How are you going to get any people in that thing?"
More on Penn and his personal photographer here
And the ABC's Weblog "The Shallow End" takes the piss out of Penn...and gets ragged on by its snippy readership.
"You certainly live down to your monniker, shallow. Penn does make a better actor than a skipper, but at least he tried. That's more than can be said of most people from the top down."
Talk about your bunches of humourless gits....
September 05, 2005
Ewww!!!
It disturbs me that this site needs to exist.
September 04, 2005
What Geeks Do on the Side
Damn! This never happened at any of the tech expos I went to:
Porn shoot uncovered at tech expo
The Secret Conspiracy Behind Everything
Not sure who to blame for the disaster in New Orleans? Here's a handy guide.
September 03, 2005
Spreading the Love
Just in case anyone thinks I only rag on Islam, here's some more examples of religious stupidity from other faiths:
School to teach "Intelligent Design" instead of evolution.
Ugh.