February 27, 2005
Warmongering Greens!
Who's bloodthirsty now, Mr Brown?
From Chief Bastard
February 25, 2005
CAT BLOGGING V
I'll be out of town this weekend, so no more posts until Monday.
February 23, 2005
The Commonwealth-isation of NATO
Mark Steyn: Atlanticist Small Talk is All That's Left
World leaders are always most expansive when there's least at stake: the Queen's Christmas message to the Commonwealth is the ne plus ultra of this basic rule. In Her Majesty's beloved Commonwealth family, talking about enduring ties became a substitute for having them.
That's the salient feature of transatlantic dialogue since 9/11: it's become Commonwealth-esque - all airy assertions about common values, ties of history, all meaningless. Even Donald Rumsfeld is doing it. At the Munich Conference on Collective Security the other day, he gave a note-perfect rendition of empty Atlanticist Euro-goo: "Our collective security depends on our co-operation and mutual respect and understanding," he declared, with a straight face.
Hattip: NZpundit
Vegetarians = Child Molestors
"Vegetarian Diet "Harms" Children"
I agree, lock up all vegans for life.
Starting with this guy.
(Sorry Boshi, you had it coming...)
What a change fifty years makes
A E Brain looks at the new Australian contribution to Iraq both here and here.
As Alan says
"But now the sons and daughters, grandsons and grand-daughters of the people who screamed "Tenno Banzai!" are on our side. They're building bridges, in more ways than one, and not casually slaughtering anyone in their way. We've been here before."
Perhaps in fifty years, Iraqi engineers will be rebuilding bridges in North Korea? Who knows.
Of course, Margo "The Fundamentalist Zionist Lobby controls Australian Media and Politics" Kingston is unhappy and making some incredibly original diatribes that boil down to Howard=Hitler!!!!1111
Boo fucking hoo.
(As a side note: The SMH letter writers are as big a set of whingers as ever. Live with it, wankers)
Update: James Ozark points out Kim Beazley's not making a lot of sense.
Piss off and Leave me alone!
Look, for all you dumb shits who keep calling my mobile, and asking "Is Foxy there?"
THERE IS NO ONE BY THAT NAME AT THIS NUMBER. I'VE TOLD YOU DIPSHITS THIS FIVE TIMES. ARE YOU TOO DUMB TO UNDERSTAND?
Ah, now I feel better.
February 21, 2005
And you thought Paris Hilton was dumb...
Some Jenna Elfman fans were startled by what the star had to say in a recent issue of Scientology’s magazine Celebrity.
The former star of “Dharma and Greg” is a devotee of the controversial religion, whose members also include Tom Cruise and John Travolta.
"I intend to make Scientology as accessible to as many people as I can. And that is my goal," Elfman said. To do this, she says, it is my "duty to clear the planet." By "clearing" she means to rid the world of "body thetans" — aliens who Scientologists believe inhabit the earth from a nuclear explosion 75 million years ago. She continued that "the more successful I became, the more suppression I bumped into … especially in the entertainment industry, which really is home to rabid suppression."
"Her comments seem to reflect an increasingly almost paranoid view of the world around her in which she appears to have cleared house of all the suppressive people," Rick Ross, who runs Cultnews.com, tells The Scoop. "Which to Scientologists would include all the people who are critical of Scientology."
From here.
Blogs Added
Some blogs added to blogroll:
Daily Ablution
Protein Wisdom
Indymediawatch
A E Brain
Whacking Day
Daily Diatribe
Ace of Spades
Mark Steyn
The Rat Pack
Bernie Slatts
The Internet's an Amazing Thing
Celebrated Pr0n producer Paris Hilton has had her phone hacked. (Warning: Link contains some dirty pr0n ads at the front)
No Millsy contact. What a shame.
She's certainly literate, though!
The only reason I didn't go to vegas was becasue I wanted to see you. How am I disrepectful
And how about this
Pauly shore xxxxxxxxxx
Hey, Buddy....
V, Holly xxx-xxx-xxxx
Please tell me this isn't Holly Valance.
And why would you keep photos of you getting naked with some skanky lesbian friend on your goddamn phone?
Update: Nick Carter - "Paris is just a big idiot".
You got that straight, Nick.
Update II: Domain names go quickly these days.
Update III: Fuck! I recognise the voice in those phone calls. But from where? Hmm....
Crimes against literature
It's the Potter Sue of the Day
*shudder*
See what thirteen year old girls with too much time on their hands get up to?
February 18, 2005
The Ghost of John Denver haunts me
My good ole country name is Clarence Joe
Take The Good Ole Country Name Generator today!
Created with Rum and Monkey's Name Generator Generator.
It's already making a difference!
Wow!
Update: House of Wheels shows Kyoto's true effect - keeping the poor in their place!
Update II: Hmm, smells like pseudoscience.
February 17, 2005
Please tell me this isn't true.
Apparently, Michael Jackson, currently suffering from the flu, is staying on the same floor as the Pediatrics Unit.
Teehee.
Do you think they could've thought that through a little better?
Additional: Check out Jacko's dream team!
Choreographer Wade Robson, from Queensland, and Brett Barnes, of Melbourne, were yesterday named among the 370 witnesses for the Jackson defence team.
They will share the court with some of the biggest names in show business, including Elizabeth Taylor, Diana Ross, Stevie Wonder
How is a blind man going to be a witness on what goes on in Neverland?
and Barry Gibb of the Bee Gees, who will all give evidence to support Jackson's claim he is not a child molester.
The two Aussies were among the many witnesses listed by Jackson's lawyers, who also said the defence would hear from Kobe Bryant, the LA Lakers basketballer who was charged with rape and is now being sued over the alleged attack, and Backstreet Boys singer Nick Carter, who is rumoured to have beaten up Paris Hilton.
Mmm...great, reliable witnesses
Jackson's defence dream team also extends to spoon bender Uri Geller and magician David Blaine, who in 2003 starved himself for 44 days in a box suspended over the River Thames in London.
Oh, for fucks sake a spoon-bender and a magician? Who's next? An indian "mystic" and some comedians?
Among the other witnesses are lifestyle guru Deepak Chopra, CNN television network host Larry King, US talk show host Jay Leno, comedian Chris Tucker, Grammy award-winning musician Quincy Jones and dozens of workers and former workers at Jackson's Neverland Ranch.
Clearly all of these expert witnesses will be able to make qualified statements on the DNA evidence.
Oil Traders Beat the Shit out of Greenpeace Hippies
I put twenty grugats on the oil man...
WHEN 35 Greenpeace protesters stormed the International Petroleum Exchange (IPE) yesterday they had planned the operation in great detail.
What they were not prepared for was the post-prandial aggression of oil traders who kicked and punched them back on to the pavement.
“We bit off more than we could chew. They were just Cockney barrow boy spivs. Total thugs,” one protester said, rubbing his bruised skull. “I’ve never seen anyone less amenable to listening to our point of view.” [...]
“They grabbed us and started kicking and punching. Then when we were on the floor they tried to push huge filing cabinets on top of us to crush us.” [...]
[T]hey were set upon by traders, most of whom were under the age of 25. “They were kicking and punching men and women indiscriminately,” a photographer said. “It was really ugly, but Greenpeace did not fight back.”
Mr Beresford said: “They followed the guys into the lobby and kept kicking and punching them there. They literally kicked them on to the pavement.”
Last night Greenpeace said two protesters were in hospital, one with a suspected broken jaw, the other with concussion.
A spokeswoman from IPE said the trading floor reopened at 3.10pm. “The floor was invaded by a small group of protesters,” she said. “Open outcry trading was suspended but electronic trading carried on.”
Eighteen police vans and six police cars surrounded the exchange and at least 27 protesters were arrested. A small band blocked the entrance to the building for the rest of the evening.
Hattip - NZPUNDIT
February 16, 2005
Cunning Linguists
Which poster do you think was hanging in ANU, encouraging new students to learn a language?
This one?
Or this one?
From Tex
Singing! Public education, now it's time, to give it mooooore!
Turning Japanese
Here's my first name in Japanese characters.
From here.
(Via A.E.Brain)
February 15, 2005
Missed it
No posts for a while, because I was busy...
...well, fuck it, not really. Just too lazy.
I was too busy enjoying Valentine's Day....alone.
(Boo hoo....)
Well, seems some aren't convinced by this Hallmark concoction:
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia (Reuters) - Saudi Arabia's morality police are on the scent of illicit red roses as part of a clampdown on would-be St Valentine's lovers in the strict Muslim kingdom.
The Committee for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, Saudi Arabia's powerful religious vigilantes, have banned shops from selling any red flowers in the run-up to February 14.
February 09, 2005
We're all gonna DIE!!!!!
The ABC breathlessly reports the following:
According to a detailed survey which will be launched later this month, the human race is facing extinction in a matter of decades and will run out of some critical resources in just a few years.
Yep, according to this "Little Green Handbook" (which I'm sure is probably as factual as the Little Red Book), the human race will be extinct by say, 2030 or so.
I call bullshit.
Chicken Littles have been predicting this kind of crap for, well, a matter of decades. One of the advantages of having lived in a house with out-of-date encyclopedia, is that the predictions of the past are there, staring you in the face.
For example, did you know we ran out of mercury in 1997?
You didn't? Why that's what one of these books reported.
Did you also know we hit seven and a half billion people last year? What? We didn't?
Did you know that in 2050 there'll be fifteen billion of us? What's that? There won't be? Population will be maxed out at nine billion?
(Or we'll all be dead, according to the little green book).
DOOMED!!! We're all DOOMED!
(The author, by the way, is a nuclear physicist, who uses one of the lamest appeals to authority to answer how is he qualified to write this doomsday piece of fiction).
Dedicated Fan
A Welsh rugby fan cut off his own testicles after his team beat England, police confirmed today.
It was reported that the man told his friends: "If Wales win I'll cut my own balls off."
After the 11-9 victory in the Six Nations clash, the man is reported to have gone outside and severed his testicles before bringing them back into the club to show fellow drinkers.
Read more.
February 08, 2005
Adams to Media: You're meant to Biased!
Some people think Rupert Murdoch has "declared war on journalism". Sometimes, I'm inclined to agree, if only because he keeps publishing Phillip Adams.
Adams' latest...uh....column... is a mournful plea from the centre of the eeeevil Howard's one party regime. Apparently democracy suffers when people elect the party he doesn't like.
As will have been noted by the politically perspicacious who peruse this publication - and particularly this page - Australia has entered an unprecedented era. As far as federal politics are concerned, we're now living in a one-party state.
Sucks, eh. The poor, poor man.
His solution:
Media needs to be the new opposition!
This man gets paid for this?
Unfortunately for Phil, it seems most people aren't fussed.
Note: Like most Adams column, he manages to have a snide little remark at George W Bush, even when it has nothing to do with the topic at hand.
Update: Adams gets fisked over at House of Wheels.
Bwahaha
Ex-Lover deletes MMORPG Character
The jilted girlfriend, said to be in her thirties, logged onto her ex-lover's Lineage account with his username and password. Once there she deleted his game data including all the items, weapons and clothes he had collected.
Although the boyfriend did not suffer financially he reported the misuse of his account to the police. Police then reported the woman of Toyama Prefecture, to the Fukushima District Public Prosecutors Office accusing her of violating a law banning illegal access to someone else's online accounts.
Unlucky...
(PS: What a valuable use of police time!)
From here.
They start young in Blighty
From news.com.au
A 12-year-old girl, who is Britain's youngest drink-driver, had been boozing at an uncle's party, a court heard yesterday.
She downed two bottles of beer and a pre-mixed drink and topped up by sneaking sips from other people's glasses.
Then she stole her father's keys and headed to see her 14-year-old niece 50km away in Hampshire. Police were alerted and spotted the car swerving all over the road and bouncing off the kerb. She was twice the alcohol limit.
The girl, now 13, appeared in a youth court yesterday. She was given a 12-month supervision order and banned from driving for two years.
Advertisement:
Defence lawyer Mike Pulsford said the girl had a taste for alcohol.
Taste for alcohol, eh? That'll put her in good stead for the future.
I bet she'll be a fun girl when she gets to uni.
Now here's the thing, the punishment was to be banned from driving for two years.
Um...what's the point of that if she's probably not legally allowed to drive for THREE years?
February 07, 2005
*cough* *cough*
Currently sick as a rather sick dog.
Throat infection or something like that - Possibly due to some nefarious Zionist neo-con plot.
Can't get to a doctor either - damn you Canberra!
February 05, 2005
Who says this?
One of the most reliable sources in media, especially entertainment news, seems to be "friends".
Paris Hilton really isn't a dirty slut, says "friends".
Michael Jackson doesn't really fiddle with little boys, says "friends".
Colin Farrell is the best dad ever, say "friends".
Ben Affleck really can act, say "friends".
Now there's:
HOLLYWOOD star Ben Affleck is set to propose to his sexy actress girlfriend Jennifer Garner, friends say.
(Don't you love how she's not just an actress, she's a sexy actress!)
Want to fill up your newspaper or tv show but don't actually have real news? Just invent some! Then, you can attribute it to:
"Friend" (Entertainment)
"Political Heavyweight" (Politics)
"International Diplomat" (International Affairs"
and finally, the ubiquitous "source", if your not sure what sort of story it is.
If you're the SMH, you can label headlines "US official confirms Allawi shot six dead." even if your source is only a Jordanian minister repeating hearsay.
Come on, its the game the whole family can play!
I am really incredibly good in bed, sources say.
Ok, so maybe that wouldn't hold up in any sort of court.
The only we will ever get away from this is to have some sort of robot reporting news.
February 04, 2005
CAT BLOGGING IV
The weekend cometh, and like always, we finish friday with some good ol' cat blogging.
Have a good weekend all.
February 03, 2005
What's with this?
Has media always been this sloppy?
We have the SMH recycling old Baghdad rumours, Dan Rather relying on forged documents, and other pieces of crappy tabloid behaviour from the highbrow press.
Now this: It seems that Associated Press and the Guardian, among others, have fallen for a hostage scene that is, get this, staged with action figures.
Update 1: Oh no! Major Matt Mason shot down over Tikrit!
Update 2: More breaking news! And the villain behind the plot!
Update 3: Zarqawi quits Al Qaeda, joins C.O.B.R.A.
Update 4: Of course, this puppet's sympathies have been long known...
What's wrong with the French Wine Industry?
Could this be an indication of deeper problems?
Two different photographs of Catherine Gachet about to sip a glass of the wine she produces in south-western France show her looking more like a Hollywood starlet than a winemaker.
But in the eyes of a French law at the centre of a battle between the country's ailing wine industry and health pressure groups, only one of the images is legal.
A court agreed with the health campaigners that the first, with the glass of wine far too close to Mrs Gachet's lips, was "too sexy" to meet the strict requirements of the so-called Evin Law which rules how alcoholic drinks can be promoted.
For the second shoot, her sultry, "come hither" expression became a wholesome grin and Mrs Gachet held the glass well away from her face. Crucially, the caption identifying her as a wine grower was featured much more prominently.
Combining sex and alcohol? Heaven forbid!
Minor Update
I rebuilt my system last weekend, and misplaced my blog password. I've got it back now, so some more posts will follow.
In the meantime I've added two photo blogs to the blogroll: Dale Holborow and Paul Keeler's travel blogs.